Empty

I was thinking deeply. I realized one thing : Actually none love me, none like me, and none needs me.

If ever there is a choice, I’m sure I will be chosen to be eliminated, to be thrown, and to be erased.

It gave me a relief because when it comes to the point of separation or ending of my part in their life, they will never be sad, upset or feel lost.

Pay Back

I decided to stop writing here. But I couldn't since I have cried a lot. So, I have think a lot and this is the result:

I will be loyal to You,

not to make You proud but to make You guilty,

yes, to pay back EVERYTHING you gave to me,

This is the special gift for You because I know there is no heal for guiltiness.

darkness

it looks dark everywhere i turned,
i know it is not womb, it is my life;
i am searching for a little light to pursue this journey,
i hope they do not open their eyes before i could find the light.

sorry for doubt

Thanks God,
i know You will not let us fall easily;
sorry for the doubt,
today i have promised to myself that whenever it seems the darkness going to cover my life fully, i will keep on memorizing all those miracles You gave me.

happy

if You appear in front of me right now,
i will sure have hugged You, kissed You ten or hundred times and keep on saying, 'Thank You... I love You...';
since You are not here or maybe i can not identify You, i am kissing towards the sky and saying, 'Thank You God... I love You...',
i know You are listening to me.

wrongs

major problem in society is they claimed that it is not wrong if do something that almost all did,
my problem is i claimed that everything we did which will never get His blessings is WRONG;
i know those are following the 'majority' will never change,
i will never change too just because the 'majority'!!!

soulmate

you may share your feelings with full excitement,
but not all listeners out there will feel happy for you;
stop share your feelings to those never understand it!
because you may look like a clown in their view.

confusion

suddenly your name comes out without my control,
i was thinking why i said that?
your name never crossed my mind,
anyway i wish you are happy at this moment.